Task 2

In this modern day and age, the rate of immigration has been constantly
increasing. There is an argument about whether these emigrant employ-
ees or students have to adapt to the culture of the countries they move
to. In the majority of circumstances, I agree that it is necessary to be
OBEY with a foreign customS, HOWEVER there are exceptions that it is
tough to follow.

Okay, that’s quite nice!

Firstly, when interacting with any person, it is vital for individuals to re-
spect the person's personality , race , and cultural background. Okay. It
is polite to accept the diversity of traditions globally and be open-
minded ENOUGH to give everything a try. In addition, honoring a differ-
ent custom can increase your reputation and explore a new environ-
ment. For example, if a Western student studies in Taiwan, tying not to
complain about the taste or smell of stinky tofu will reflect your kindness
and also provide the pupil an unforgettable memory.

Mmmmm…. good for the first half but this paragraph gets lost in the
second half.

However, in certain situations, migrators may reject local cultures due to

religions. Okay. Religion. In some nations, some animals are symbolized
as the god or goddess AND AS A RESULT THOSE CREATURES ARE CONSID-
ERED TO BE SACRED. BECAUSE OF THIS BELIEVERSs are FORBIDDEN to
CONSUME the meat products of those creatures such as pork and beef.
For instance, a Muslim will keep away from braised pork rice , one of the
traditional Taiwanese dishes to represent his or her honor of the religion.

Uh-oh… a little off structure. The idea makes sense, but it’s weakly de-
veloped and the middle sentence is quite bad for grammar.

In conclusion, foreigners should experience the cultures of the countries

which they decide to live in, but only within reasons. FINALLY, I suggest
that everyone should respect all the customs overseas, individuals
should not be forced to disobey their religioUS standardS.

I think… it’s a….

BAND 5.5!
Your ideas don’t develop very logically. You had a good idea in Para-
graph 1, but you changed the idea in the third sentence. Take ONE idea
and develop it through your paragraph, finishing with an example.

Sometimes your grammar is very good. Sometimes you lose focus and
it starts to become word salad (詞沙拉). Focus!

Actually, I think you’re capable of doing this. I think you could push to
Band 6.5-7 *quite easily*

I will give you another homework. I will give you another Task 1 home-
work as well.