The graph illustrates the amounts of visitors WHO TRAVELLED TO the Caribbean island and it

also highlights the numbers of visitors WHO STAYED on cruise ships and
STAYED on the island respectively during the period 2010 to 2017. Overall,
there was a gradual rise from 2010 to 2016 in the total numbers of visitors, then
it increased steeply between 2016 and 2017. The numbers of visi- tors staying
on the island WAS higher than those WHO STAYED on cruise ships in the
beginning, while BY THE END OF THE PERIOD THE TREND WAS OPPO-
SITE.

The number of visitors staying on the island levelLed off from 2010 to 2011, which is 0.75 millions. It
moderately grew and remain stable at 1.5 millions from 2011 to 2015. However, it’s slowly declined and
slightly climbed between 2015 to 2017, which maintain the same number of 2015 in the end, 1.5 millions.

As for the numbers of visitors staying on the cruise ships, it slightly rose and slowly declined to 0.25 mil-
lions from 2010 to 2012. However, it dramatically increased from 2012 to 2017, which is 2 millions visitors
in the end. In addition, it exceeded that of those staying on the islands in 2016.

GRAMMAR CORRECTION (past tense)

IN THE MODERN ERA purchasing products through the Internet is A popular trend in the
contemporary society. I’m convinced that the main reason that customers rely on this shop-
ping mode is A VARIETY OF choices. However, it also has some shortcomings such as
long delivery times. In the following essay I will expand upon my ideas and provide sup-
porting evidence.
1. Numerous choices make customers enjoy shopping online instead of physical store. 2.
They can browse the same products in different online shop easily, which can also shop
around for the better price. 3. As a result, shoppers don’t need to spend time finding
stores that SELL the same product and go shopping in person. 4. Based on the recent in-
vestigation by Taiwan famous electronic commerce”Shopee”, there is 85% of customers
prefer using online shopping platformS because of the variety of choices.

1. The reason that CUSTOMERS enjoy SHOPPING ONLINE is because they have NU-
MEROUS CHOICES>

Although ONLIEN SHOPPING What is IT? offers various products, there are also some
shortcomings such as long delivery times. What customers fear most is that products are
out of stock, which they should wait for at least two weeks. As a result, consumers have to
wait longer and it should plus shipping time too, which could extend up to a month. Taking
the comments on Shopee for example, almost two-third of CUSTOMERS WERE complain-
ing ABOUT waiting too long.

OKAY, THIS IS MUCH BETTER.

In conclusion, variety choices of products greatly appeals to customers a lot, which is more
convenient for them. However, time is money, long delivery times is the factor that the cus-
tomer should also take into account, as it may be an unsatisfactory online shopping experi-
ence.

BAND 6-6.5
 IN CONTEMPORARY TIMES individuals work for themselves as freelancers rather than
for employers AND THIS is a rising trend in this MODERN society. I believe that the main
reason for this trends is the freedom it provides individuals. However, it also has some
shortcomings such as unfixed workload. In the following essay I will expand upon my ideas
and provide supporting evidence.

1. I believe that working with no restrictions gives the individuals more flexibility with
their time. 2. They can arrange their working time independently and take good use of other
times to do more things. 3. They are free to choose when it is THE most productive for them
to work AND they can use the OTHER TIMES for exercise or other activities. 5. For exam-
ple, a famous influencer, JOLIN CAI wakes up at 12 p.m., does housework and exercisE
in the afternoon and at night, it’s her work time.

Why 7 sentences, Julia? PLEASE try to concentrate on the structure I taught you.

DON’T write 5 word sentences.

1. Although flexible work timeS are attractive, there are also shortcomings such as un-
fixed workload. 2. FREELANCERS monthly workloads are not as regular as those of em-
ployees work for COMPANIES WITHA STABLE SCHEDULE. 3. It depends on the will-
ingness of the clients or companies they work with. 4. As a result, they may have busy
months, while also THEY may have months with little or even no work, it’s very unpre-
dictable. 5. It’s also cause the unstable income. 6. Take a Taiwanese YouTuber called
Jaylee for an example. Some videos contain advertisement, while others don’t.

take a TW YT called Jaylee as an example, some months he makes thousands of dol-

lars, but some months he can barely pay his rent.

Seven sentences, Julia? I taught you to follow a FOUR sentence structure.

In conclusion, the increasing trend of individuals choosing self-employment can be attrib-

uted to the flexibility it offers in managing their time. However, they must also be prepared
for the possibility of unpredictable workloads and unstable income each month.

BAND 5.5-6
 The graph illustrates the amounts of visitors visiting the Caribbean island and it also highlights the numbers
of visitors staying on cruise ships and staying on the island respectively during the period 2010 to 2017.
Overall, there was a gradual rise from 2010 to 2016 in the total numbers of visitors, then it increased steeply
between 2016 and 2017. The numbers of visitors staying on the island is higher than those staying on cruise
ships in the beginning, while it’s opposite in the end.

The number of visitors staying on the island leveled off from 2010 to 2011, which is 0.75 millions. It mod-
erately grew and remain stable at 1.5 millions from 2011 to 2015. However, it’s slowly declined and slightly
climbed between 2015 to 2017, which maintain the same number of 2015 in the end, 1.5 millions.

As for the numbers of visitors staying on the cruise ships, it slightly rose and slowly declined to 0.25 mil-
lions from 2010 to 2012. However, it dramatically increased from 2012 to 2017, which is 2 millions visitors
in the end. In addition, it exceeded that of those staying on the islands in 2016.

GRAMMAR CORRECTION