The boom of digital appliances, especially the mobile phone has significantly

modified the society, where people no longer suffer from long distance
communication. This trend has created a spare distance in society and raised a
concern among parents. Some said it is better to treat mobile phones the same as
smoking where they find their children addicted to it, and I firmly agreed with
the statement.

Initially, smoking significantly harms the user by transferring the toxic which
temporarily boost the sanity, make them addicted with fake enlighten feeling
and enthusiasm but slowly destroy their lungs and brain cells. Furthermore, the
smoke from this action can spread the same toxicity onto individuals who stay
near the host. This creates an anomaly in a crowded, compressed society where
people should have stayed near together.

Similar but contrast to smoking, with the increasing trend in mobile phone
usage, people, especially the youth who spend a noticeable amount on it form a
barrier, avoid their relatives and parents to make conversations with them. This
is a form of antisocial, not in a direct method as poison society, pushing people
away but eliminating themselves from society. Consequently, self-harming
while performing the viral videos, and autism are popular syndromes. The
solutions can be simple. Ban phone usage from academic places can be a great
step, with the exception of college and high school, where phones can
significantly elevate the information value. Furthermore, the screen time
limitation for children should be introduced by parents.

Ultimately, presenting strict regulations can significantly reduce these self-

destructive trends. Thus these laws given by authorities can cause concern
among children's rights. I wholeheartedly believe this can result in long-term
benefits.

1. “the toxic” nên là “toxins”:

o Trong câu gốc, Đức Bình viết “the toxic,” nhưng từ đúng phải là “toxins.”
o “Toxic” là tính từ, còn “toxins” là danh từ, thể hiện sự chất độc.
o Ví dụ: “The toxins in cigarette smoke are harmful to health.”
2. “make them addicted with fake enlighten feeling” nên là “make them addicted to a false
sense of enlightenment”:
o Câu gốc không rõ ràng về ý nghĩa.
o “Addicted to a false sense of enlightenment” diễn đạt ý rằng việc sử dụng điện thoại di động
khiến người dùng nghiện một cảm giác giả tạo về sự thông thái.
3. “slowly destroy their lungs and brain cells” nên là “gradually damage their lungs and
brain cells”:
o “Destroy” có nghĩa là phá hủy hoàn toàn, trong khi “damage” chỉ là gây tổn thương.
o Để tránh quá lời, ta nên sử dụng “gradually damage” để diễn đạt ý hủy hoại từ từ.
4. “spread the same toxicity onto individuals” nên là “expose individuals to the same
toxins”:
o “Spread” có nghĩa là lan truyền, trong khi “expose” có nghĩa là tiếp xúc với.
o Để diễn đạt ý, ta nên sử dụng “expose individuals to the same toxins” để chỉ việc đưa ra tiếp
xúc với chất độc giống nhau.
5. “eliminating themselves from society” nên là “isolating themselves from society”:
o “Eliminate” có nghĩa là loại bỏ, trong khi “isolate” có nghĩa là cô lập.
o Để diễn đạt ý, ta nên sử dụng “isolating themselves from society” để chỉ việc tự cô lập khỏi
xã hội.