MASTER OF BUSINESS

ADMINISTRATION

THE FUTURE WAY OF

Corporate Communication
Forum No. I: Dealing with Behavioral
Communication Styles

Prepared by:
Tawfik AbdelMajeed Aydieh

Supervised by:
Mr. Atef Ramzy
October, 2017
THE SUCCESS OF THE COMMUNICATION IS THE
RESPONSIBILITY OF THE COMMUNICATOR

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1.0 INTRODUCTION

Behavioral Communication is defined as a psychological construct which influences individual

differences in the expression of feelings, needs, and thoughts as a substitute for more direct and
open communication. Specifically, it refers to people's tendency to express feelings, needs, and
thoughts by means of indirect messages and behavioral impacts. It can be argued that much of
our communication is, in fact, non-verbal.

Any behavior (or its absence when one is expected) may be judged as communicative if it has the
intent to convey a message.

The construct of behavioral communication is conceived as a variable of Individual differences.

This means that some people more than others tend to engage in indirect or behavioral
communication, whether consciously doing so or unconsciously doing so, in spite of the plausible
alternatives of using verbal communication. An individual's behavioral style greatly effects their
verbal and nonverbal communication. It is rare that someone utilizes all one behavioral
communication style, all of the time. Being able to identify one's own behavioral style requires a
high level of self-awareness.

Good communication skills require a high level of self-awareness. Understanding your personal
style of communicating will go a long way toward helping you to create good and lasting
impressions on others. By becoming more aware of how others perceive you, you can adapt more
readily to their styles of communicating. This does not mean you have to be a chameleon,
changing with every personality you meet. Instead, you can make another person more
comfortable with you by selecting and emphasizing certain behaviors that fit within your
personality and resonate with another.

Assertiveness is a style of communication that greatly enhances our effectiveness with others
and produces the most positive outcomes. Assertiveness can enhance the following:
 Improve interpersonal relationships
 Enhance self-esteem
 Minimize stress
 Reduce feelings of helplessness/depression
 Reduce conflicts/anxiety
 Retrain self-respect
 Treat others respectfully
 Gives a sense of control

Generally, there are four different types of communication behavior:

 Passive
 Aggressive
 Passive-Aggressive
 Assertive

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2.0 THE FOUR BASIC STYLES OF COMMUNICATION
2.1 Passive Communication
Passive Communication is a style in which individuals have developed a pattern of avoiding
expressing their opinions or feelings, protecting their rights, and identifying and meeting their
needs. As a result, passive individuals do not respond overtly to hurtful or anger-inducing
situations. Instead, they allow grievances and annoyances to mount, usually unaware of the
buildup. But once they have reached their high tolerance threshold for unacceptable behavior,
they are prone to explosive outbursts, which are usually out of proportion to the triggering
incident. After the outburst, however, they may feel shame, guilt, and confusion, so they return
to being passive.
2.2.1 Behavioral Characteristics
Passive communicators will often:
 Fail to assert for themselves
 Allow others to deliberately or inadvertently infringe on their rights
 Fail to express their feelings, needs, or opinions
 Tend to speak softly or apologetically
 Exhibit poor eye contact and slumped body posture.
2.2.2 The impact of a pattern of passive communication
The impact of a pattern of passive communication is that these individuals:
 Often feel anxious because life seems out of their control
 Often feel depressed because they feel stuck and hopeless
 Often feel resentful (but are unaware of it) because their needs are not being met
 Often feel confused because they ignore their own feelings
 Are unable to mature because real issues are never addressed
2.2.3 Language, Mottos and Beliefs
A passive communicator will say, believe, or behave like:
 “I’m unable to stand up for my rights.”  “I don’t know what my rights are.”
 “I get stepped on by everyone."  “People never consider my feelings.”
 “I’m weak and unable to take care of myself.”
2.2.4 Dealing with Passive communicator
A person operating from the Passive style tends to avoid conflict at all costs. This person will
internalize discomfort rather than risk upsetting others. This style tends to result in a lose-win
situation, and results in feelings of victimization, resentment, and a loss of a sense of control.
A person who uses this style in many of his daily interactions has the underlying belief that other
peoples’ needs are more important than their own, and that if he speaks up, others will ignore
or reject him. This individual usually has a low sense of self-esteem, and has a difficult time
recognizing his/her own needs and knowing how to get them met more appropriately.
The ways of dealing with Passive (a lose/win situation) behavioral styles are as follows:
 Avoid Conflict  Accommodate  Suppress
 It is better to give instructions.  Establish trust
 Encourage an environment of solving problems and discussing options
 Be open, direct and honest, modeling assertive behavior
 Give permission to be decisive and praise for participation

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2.2 Aggressive Communication
Aggressive Communication is a style in which individuals express their feelings and opinions and
advocate for their needs in a way that violates the rights of others. Thus, aggressive
communicators are verbally and/or physically abusive.
This style is about winning – often at someone else's expense. An aggressive person behaves as
if their needs are the most important, as though they have more rights, and have more to
contribute than other people. It is an ineffective communication style as the content of the
message may get lost because people are too busy reacting to the way it's delivered.
2.2.5 Behavioral Characteristics
Aggressive communicators will often:
 try to dominate others
 use humiliation to control others
 criticize, blame, or attack others
 be very impulsive
 have low frustration tolerance
 speak in a loud, demanding, and overbearing voice
 act threateningly and rudely
 not listen well
 interrupt frequently
 use “you” statements
 have an overbearing or intimidating posture
2.2.6 The impact of a pattern of passive communication
The impact of a pattern of aggressive communication is that these individuals:
 become alienated from others
 alienate others
 generate fear and hatred in others
 always blame others instead of owning their issues, and thus are unable to mature
2.2.7 Language, Mottos and Beliefs
The aggressive communicator will say, believe, or behave like:
 “I’m superior and right and you’re inferior and wrong.”
 “I’m loud, bossy and pushy.”  “It’s all your fault.”
 “I can dominate and intimidate you.”  “I react instantly.”
 “I can violate your rights.”  “I’m entitled.”
 “I’ll get my way no matter what.”  “You owe me.”
 “You’re not worth anything.”  “I own you.”
2.2.8 Dealing with Aggressive communicator
The Aggressive person creates a win-lose situation. This individual uses intimidation and control
to get his/her needs met, and is disrespectful and hurtful to others in communications. This
style tends to result in a win/lose situation and has the underlying beliefs that power and control
are the only way to get needs met. This person operates from a real sense of inadequacy and
may have a lack of empathy for others.
The ways of dealing with Aggressive behavioral styles are as follows:
 Force  Effective listening  Give some responsibility
 Keep my options opened  Reclaim power
 Discuss - not give orders  Depersonalize and shift from reactive to proactive
 Give him/her chance to take minor decisions

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2.3 Passive-Aggressive Communication
This is a style in which people appear passive on the surface, but are actually acting out their
anger in indirect or behind-the-scenes ways. Prisoners of War often act in passive-aggressive
ways in order to deal with an overwhelming lack of power. People who behave in this manner
usually feel powerless and resentful, and express their feelings by subtly undermining the object
(real or imagined) of their resentments – even if this ends up sabotaging themselves. The
expression "Cut off your nose to spite your face" is a perfect description of passive-aggressive
behavior.
2.3.1 Behavioral Characteristics
Passive-Aggressive communicators will often:
 mutter to themselves rather than confront the person or issue
 have difficulty acknowledging their anger
 use facial expressions that don't match how they feel - i.e., smiling when angry
 use sarcasm
 deny there is a problem
 appear cooperative while purposely doing things to annoy and disrupt
 use subtle sabotage to get even
2.3.2 The impact of a pattern of Passive-Aggressive Communication
The impact of a pattern of passive-aggressive communication is that these individuals:
 become alienated from those around them
 remain stuck in a position of powerlessness
 discharge resentment while real issues are never addressed so they can't mature
2.3.3 Language, Mottos and Beliefs
The passive-aggressive communicator will say, believe, or behave like:
 “I’m weak and resentful, so I sabotage, frustrate, and disrupt.”
 “I’m powerless to deal with you head on so I must use guerilla warfare.”
 “I will appear cooperative but I’m not.”
2.3.4 Dealing with Passive-Aggressive communicator
The Passive-Aggressive person incorporates elements of both of the Passive and Aggressive
styles. He tends to use procrastination, forgetfulness, and intentional inefficiency rather than
being direct in his communications with others (a lose/lose situation).

The ways of dealing with Passive- Aggressive behavioral styles are as follows:
 Don’t get caught up and do your best to remain calm.
 Consider what’s motivating the behavior.
 Own your part, as both parties are contributing in reaching such an attitude.
 Focus on the content, not the delivery, if you can focus on the underlying business concern
or question rather than the way he/she’s expressing him/herself, you can move on to
addressing the actual problem.
 Acknowledge the underlying issue, sometimes it’s that they just want their opinion heard.
 Watch your language, don’t accuse such persons, it would put someone who’s already on
the defensive into an angrier position. Don’t label or judge.

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2.4 Assertive Communication

This is a style in which individuals clearly state their opinions and feelings, and firmly advocate
for their rights and needs without violating the rights of others. These individuals value
themselves, their time, and their emotional, spiritual, and physical needs and are strong
advocates for themselves while being very respectful of the rights of others.
Assertive communication is born of high self-esteem. It is the healthiest and most effective style
of communication - the sweet spot between being too aggressive and too passive. When we are
assertive, we have the confidence to communicate without resorting to games or manipulation.
We know our limits and don't allow ourselves to be pushed beyond them just because someone
else wants or needs something from us. Surprisingly, however, Assertive is the style most people
use least.
2.4.1 Behavioral Characteristics
Assertive communicators will:
 State needs and wants clearly, appropriately, and respectfully
 Express feelings clearly, appropriately, and respectfully
 Use “I” statements  Speak in a calm and clear tone of voice
 Communicate respect for others  Have a relaxed body posture
 Listen well without interrupting  Feel connected to others
 Feel in control of self  Feel competent and in control
 Have good eye contact  Not allow others to abuse or manipulate them
 Stand up for their rights.
2.4.2 The impact of a pattern of Assertive Communication
The impact of a pattern of assertive communication is that these individuals:
 feel connected to others
 feel in control of their lives
 are able to mature because they address issues and problems as they arise
 create a respectful environment for others to grow and mature
2.4.3 Language, Mottos and Beliefs
The assertive communicator will say, believe, or behave in a way that says:
 “We are equally entitled to express ourselves respectfully to one another.”
 “I am confident about who I am.”
 “I realize I have choices in my life and I consider my options.”
 “I speak clearly, honestly, and to the point.”
 “I can’t control others but I can control myself.”
 “I place a high priority on having my rights respected.”
 “I am responsible for getting my needs met in a respectful manner.”
 “I respect the rights of others.”
 “Nobody owes me anything unless they’ve agreed to give it to me.”
 “I’m 100% responsible for my own happiness.”
2.4.4 Dealing with Assertive communicator
The Assertive person is direct with the goal of creating a win-win situation. This style respects
one’s own rights and opinions, as well as those of the other person. This individual operates
from the belief that each of us is responsible for solving our own problems, and neither party in
communication has to justify themselves to each other. This person takes responsibility for his
own decisions and actions.

The ways of dealing with Assertive behavioral styles are as follows:

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  Collaborate and Integrate
 watch out the situation
 Be quiet and don’t rush in
 Control myself and my body language
 Try not to interrupt
 Actively listen, look alert and don’t get distracted
 Have the self-discipline to keep the person and the problem separate.
 When they’ve finished speaking, try to hold the silence for a while.
 Make sure to deliver my point of view from the discussion.
 Speak assertively, give myself the chance to think and speak at a measured pace.
 Be positive throughout the conversation and don’t be frightened to encourage discussion
about the issue.
 Take control of the discussion by being the one to conclude it.
 Try to have the moral courage and confidence to offer an ultimatum if I think it’s warranted.

Assertiveness provides several benefits that can help you both in your workplace and in other
areas of your life. In general, assertive people:
 Make great managers. They get things done by treating people with fairness and respect,
and are treated by others the same way in return. This means that they are often well-liked
and seen as leaders that people want to work with.
 Negotiate successful "win-win" solutions. They are able to recognize the value of their
opponent's position and can quickly find common ground with him.
 Are better doers and problem solvers. They feel empowered to do whatever it takes to find
the best solution to the problems that they encounter.
 Are less anxious and stressed. They are self-assured and don't feel threatened or victimized
when things don't go as planned or as expected.

3.0 CONCLUSION
A good understanding of the four basic styles of communication will help you learn how to react
most effectively when confronted with a difficult person. It will also help you recognize when you
are not being assertive or not behaving in the most effective way. Remember, you always have a
choice as to which communication style you use. Being assertive is usually the most effective, but
other styles are, of course, necessary in certain situations – such as being submissive when under
physical threat (a mugging, hijacking etc.).

Good communication skills require a high level of self-awareness. Once you understand your own
communication style, it is much easier to identify any shortcomings or areas which can be
improved on, if you want to start communicating in a more assertive manner.

If you're serious about strengthening your relationships, reducing stress from conflict and
decreasing unnecessary anxiety in your life, practice being more assertive. It will help you diffuse
anger, reduce guilt and build better relationships both personally and professionally.

Remember the first rule of effective communication: The success of the communication is the
responsibility of the communicator.

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