Teacher’s Day Act

Period 1
Students: Good Morning, Sir.
Teacher: Good Morning, sit down and give your
attendance.
Teacher: Raghu
Raghu: Present, Sir.
Teacher: Shyam
Shyam: Present, Sir.
Teacher: Pinky
Pinky: Present, Sir
Teacher: Chulbul
(Chulbul ke taraf se koi jawab nahi kyuki Shyam ne
uska muh band kar diya hai)
Shyam: Absent, Sir.
Teacher: ajeeb baat hai ye phichale ek mahine se nahi
aaya lekin parents bolte hai hai ki jata hai. Chalo
chhoro, Pappu
Shyam: Absent, Sir.
Teacher: Kyu
Shyam: Sir, wo car ne use thok diya hai.
Teacher: Okay, Ramu
Shyam: wo bhi nahi aaya, sir
Teacher: wo kyu nahi aaya.
Shyam: Sir bataya na ki Pappu ko car ne thok diya.
Teacher: to Ramu kyu nahi aaya.
Shyam: Sir Ramu hi to wo car chala raha tha.
(All laughs)
(Jaddu enters)
Jaddu: andar aa sakte hai sir.
Teacher: Come why you are late?
Jaddu: kya sir??
Teacher: why you are late?
Jaddu: kya sir??
Teacher: late kyu ho bhai?
Jaddu: Sir wo bahar board laga tha kripya dheere chale
Teacher: to late kyu huye
Jaddu: ajeeb baat karte hai sir ab jab dheere challenge
to late nahi honge. Hame sak hota hai aapko teacher
kisne banaya.
Teacher: Shut up aur apne jagah par jao warna fail kar
denge.
(Sab halla karne lagte hai)
Teacher: Shut up and give your attendance. Simran
Simran: Haanji, Sir.
Teacher: Happy
Happy: Yes, Sir.
Teacher: Jaddu ... Jaddu
(No response from Jaddu)
Teacher: Jaddu, Give your attendance.
Jaddu: kya, sir.
Teacher: Attendance do.
(Jaddu started finding something)
Teacher: kya kar rahe ho?
Jaddu: Attendance khoj raha ho sir.
Teacher: apna hajari Lagaeye sir ji.
(Attendance Completed)
Teacher: Okay, Today our topic is Average Income.
Average Income is equal to Total Income of the
Country upon total pollution.
Students: Population, Sir, population.
Teacher: Yeah, yeah, Population I’m Sorry.
Okay any one has any doubt
(No reply)
No one has any doubt.
Okay Raghu stand up and tell me, what is Total
Income?
Raghu: Sir, mere dadaji kip agar, mere papa ki pagar,
meri pagar, mere bachhe ki pagar, uski bachhe ki pagar.
Teacher: Bas!
Raghu: To sir uske bachhe ki bhi pagar.
Teacher: Shut up, sit down.
Okay so our new topic...
(Jaddu interrupt)
Jaddu: Sir, humko ek sanka hai.
Teacher: haan batao.
Jaddu: Sir, Simran pahle Raghu ke saath baithi fir
chulbul ke saath baithi lekin mere saath nahi baithi kyu
sir mere chehre par gobar laga hai kya mai naste mein
bachhe khata hoon kya?
(Between this bell rang)
Teacher: iska answer main tumhe kal dunga.

Period 2
Students: Good Morning, Sir.
Teacher: Good Morning, students. Today I will
conduct your surprise test.
Simran: No, Sir. We want entertainment.
Teacher: No, there will be no entertainment. Just sit
down.
Pinky: Oye, Entertainment, entertainment,
entertainment. Sir, dialogue kaisa tha.
Teacher: ye dialogue tha you stupid just sit down.
Okay what you want?
Pinky: Sir, aaj aap question puchiye aur hum answer
denge.
Teacher: Okay, tell me, “Bhahuwachan kya hai?”
Simran (Raising her hand): Jab bahu apne sasural
wale ko khari khhoti sunaye to use bahuwachan kahte
hai.
(All laughs)
Teacher: You stupid, tumse nahi hoga just sit down
and give your test. I am giving you two minute for
revising after that I will conduct your test.
(Jaddu made cheat between these two minutes)
(Teacher distributed question papers and test
begins)
Pinky (making mistake in her answer sheet): Oh,
shit.
Happy (copying from Pinky): Shit.
Shyam (also copying from Happy): Hurry! Maine
copy nahi kiya.
(Teacher saw it and collected paper from all the
students)
Teacher: tumme sabse sarif Jaddu hai sabse ache se
test usi ne diya hai ekdum shanti se.
Chulbul: Sir, uski sarafat to uski sleeve me latak rahi
hai.
Teacher: Yes, Jaddu? Jara edhar aao.
Jaddu: nahi sir kuchh nahi hai.
Teacher: tum edhar to aao sub clear ho jayega ki kya
hai kya nahi hai. Aao.
(Teacher brings out a long cheat from his sleeve and
slapped him)
Teacher: Aaise na kabhi pass nahi hoge...
Chulbul (Interrupted): Sir test paper kab milega?
Teacher: Kal aur jao apni seat par baitho.
Pinky: sir aap mujhse G.K. ki koi bhi sawal puchiye
mai bata dungi.
Teacher: Achha Pinky batao Qutab Minar kahan hai?
(Pinky started founding Qutab Minar)
Teacher: what are you doing?
Pinky: Sir mai Qutab Minar khoj rahi hoon lekin kahin
dikh hi nahi raha hai.
Teacher: Sit down tumse nahi hoga.
Shyam and Simran: Sir aap humse jo sawal chahe
puchiye hum uska jawab denge.
Teacher: achha to chalo Simran batao 1869 me kya
hua tha?
Simran: Gandhi ji ka janm.
Teacher: achha Shyam tum batao 1872 me kya hua
tha?
Shyam: Sir Gandhi ji 3 saal ke hue the.
Teacher: what a brilliant answer. Achha ab ye batao
Shilong kahan ki Rajdhani hai?
Shyam: Sir, Sikkim ki.
Teacher: Galat, Meghalaya ki hai.
Shyam: To Sir humne ye kab kaha ki hum sub ka
jawab sahi denge humne ye kaha hum aap ke sabhi
sawal ka jawab denge.