Unit 3 Peer Review: Editing

Directions: Mark your responses directly onto the paper you are editing. Or, you can write your
answers here. If you are unsure, simply state that something seems off but you are unsure of
what.

1. How is the essay organized? Does each paragraph contain one and only one main idea
that connects to the thesis? Does this organization help move the ideas forward? Tell the
author if the organization works or offer organization ideas.

The essay is organized correctly with the appropriate subtitles. Yes, the paragraphs only
contain one main idea that connects to the thesis. Yes, the organization helps the ideas
move forward.

2. Where could the author use stronger transitions to strengthen connections between his/her
points?

The author could use stronger transitions between the topic sentence and the following
sentence and the concluding sentences of their paragraphs.

3. Does the author have any fragments, comma splices, or run-ons? If so, mark them in the
text. If you know the rule, then go ahead an offer advice to the author. If you do not know
the rule, then simply mention that something seems off.\

From what I can tell, the author does not have any grammatical errors in their work.

4. Where could the author use more detail to further illustrate his/her thesis? Indicate these
places in the text.

The author could add some more detail to their introduction and the sentences following their
topic sentences in the paragraphs.

5. Are the style and tone of the essay appropriate for the audience?

Yes, the style and tone of the essay are appropriate for the audience.

6. Are the sentences and word choices varied? Does the author use strong, active verbs and
solid, descriptive nouns? Indicate where the author could strengthen the verbs and nouns.

Yes, the sentences and word choices are varied. The author uses strong, active verbs and
solid, descriptive nouns. However, there are a couple places where the verbs can be
changed.

7. Is the author too repetitive or present too much information? In other words, does the
essay overwhelm you as a reader because there is too much information or underwhelm
you because there is too little information?
 I believe that the author overwhelms the readers with how much information there is, so
they should try to spread out the information and get rid of what is not necessary.

8. Is the essay confusing because information has been omitted and/or too much information
is assumed to be known by the readers?

No, the author provides enough information, so the readers are able to understand what is
being said in the essay.

9. Is the essay in the correct MLA format?

The essay is in the correct MLA format.

10. What are three things that this author does very well?

The author is able to explain information about the topic very well.

 Good word usage .

 Great introduction.

11. What are two or three revision suggestions you have for the writer?

 Try not to overwhelm the readers with too much information.

 Make the conclusion as strong as the introduction.